It's not just food...it's way more important...

I've made no secret of the fact that I'm trying to eat healthier and have added more physical activity to my life.  When you're trying to be a healthier person, your relationship to food gets complicated.  Most trainers will tell you to think of food as fuel for your body.  It's not a reward, it's fuel.  Nothing more.

Sounds like a great idea, right? I just can't do that.  I'm Italian, and as such food is way more than that.  Italians tie their whole family experience to food.  You don't feel well? Have some pasta, you'll feel better.  Something to celebrate? Have everyone over for a meal. Someone died? I'll send a lasagne.  Cooking for someone is taking care of someone.  It's nurturing.  It's also bonding.  A lot of the best conversations of my life have happened while cooking and cleaning up...not to mention the actual meals themselves.

My dad's family(the Italian side of my heritage) lives in Pennsylvania and even though we didn't get to visit often, when we did come into town it was an event.  The whole family would gather at Aunt Mame's house and there would be Holiday soup(italian wedding soup) and pasta and veal parmigiana and bread and people I didn't know pinching my cheeks and telling me to" eat...Eat... you're so skinny!.. Anthony...what are you feeding this child? What do you mean you don't want gravy on your pasta? That's just not right...."

So now, I continue the tradition.  I make up events to cook for my kids and their friends.  When TrueBlood is on HBO we have Truebloodfests.  I make dinner... we all watch the show, make snarky comments, discuss life.  When Walking Dead is on ...it's Walkingdeadathon.  Same process...different show.

Food is so much more than fuel.  Its the whole experience of nourishing your body and nurturing your family.  Cooking is texture and taste and smell and experimenting with all those things.

Love and cooking should both be approached with reckless abandon.

Caprese pasta salad

ok....so THAT didn't happen, but THIS did.....

I realize that I haven't been doing a very good job of keeping this up to date. Well, a lot has happened since last we met.  The house thing.....eh..didn't happen.  Alas, it was just not meant to be.  Between the two of us...I think me and 'The Accomplice'(at this point...he's more than a BoyFriend and more like a partner in crime)dodged a bullet on it.  It was a beautiful place, it had glorious potential, but I think we were a little ambitious in our aspirations.  eh, it happens.  

So, we adjust our sails and sail on.  While he searches for another likely abode, I have developed a deep need to punch stuff.  I kickbox at least 4 times a week.  I had begun my journey into better health with Pride Fitness... and I enjoyed it and all the people there, but I needed more.  I found Bodyfit kickboxing and I go 4 nights a week now, and Saturday mornings too.  You may not see the changes above....but I do.  First of all, the picture on the right is the first time I've ever liked a full length picture of myself. Wanna know why?  Because it shows how strong I am, it's not a passive picture, I'm an active participant.  

Change is so much more than what's on the scale.  Change is attitude and finding the strength to work at it every day and knowing that eventually...you'll get where you are meant to be.  It's a slow process, and that's ok. I'm in this for the long haul, I'm not looking for a temporary fix.  I signed up for the Warrior Dash on September 28th, 2013....that's a couple days before my 49th birthday.  I 'm not going to be the fastest participant, and I'm ok with that.  I am going to be a participant... and that's the important part.  

Participate in your life. Don't just let it happen to you. MAKE it happen FOR you.

Thisclose

You know...it's really hard when you get so close to getting all the stuff you worked so hard towards...and then it looks like it's not gonna happen.   As I've previously posted..the BF and I had found a place and we're in the process of trying to make it our own.  It's such a frustrating process anyway and with the recent financial industry debacles...it's even that much more so.  The hoops that the BF is being made to jump through and the mountain of paperwork he's having to provide is just staggering.

It's not looking good.  Not at all.  I guess I'm just used to not getting what I really want....so I don't get as invested as quickly and I settle for something else. Makes it less disappointing, but you end up thisclose to the thing you REALLY want...and you get the thing that is almost what you want....but just not quite.

He doesn't do that. He doesn't give up.  He's got the focus of an eagle. He figures out what the thing is- and that's it. Even though it's looking like the fat lady is singing....he's busy trying to find an alternative solution to shut her up.  I've never had anyone who wanted so badly to make a life with me, that he didn't take 'uh, I don't think so' for an answer.  I hope it works....

Big Changes......scary stuff

Making a big life change is scary...you know what's scarier? Regret.

I haven't written in awhile...and I won't bore you with excuses.  It's just not been a big priority.  Other stuff is.  The boyfriend and I had been talking about getting a place together.  There were a lot of negotiations. Did a lot of research, took some road trips to explore possible towns and abodes.  Well, we finally found a place that met both of our requirements.   Acreage and privacy for him...neighbors, community and a reasonable commute for me.  The picture is from our future backyard.... pretty awesome, huh? Plenty of room for his two dogs, my cat and all his electronics.

When you make the decision to shake things up a bit....things move pretty fast.  I've been working out.... but I admit I kinda slacked off again during the holidays. As fresh motivation  I signed up for the Warrior Dash which takes place September 28th, 2013... it takes place a couple days before my 49th birthday.  That should be interesting.   So, I'm trying to train for that, eat healthy...blah...blah..blah..  :)

Then there is the profile I did of my buddy,Mark   Click that to see it.

Anyway, there are big plans for the future.  I want to create a fitness trail around the perimeter of the five acre property.  He wants to make a game room out of one of the outbuildings.  There are renovations to be made and a life to build.  Pretty exciting stuff.  Can't wait to have morning walks on the trail, show movies on the side of the barn and have friends over for dinner and sit out in the gazebo and sip wine and read under the twinkling christmas lights I want to string.

I've never lived more than twenty minutes from where I grew up, and this will be an adjustment.  Life is a pretty big adventure.  Let's do this!